Stupid Ming YOUTH part 4

From the basketball court came a 2.1m basketball player who is sweating a lot.

Beside him was one student and stupid ming..They started discussing why that 2.1m man was sweating so much.

A=the student , M= stupid ming.

A: tell me why that 2.1m man is sweating so much?

M:It is because he is so tall!

A: why does tall affect people sweating???

M:Because he is nearer to sun!!!

A: ?????

PTM- Parent-teacher-meeting

I was so worried the few days before as i only know some of my results but not all.
I was worried about what is my position in class, is it top5?, is it top 10? or even last few!
i was also worried about my level position, how did i score?top 10 ?top 40?last 40?
There are also more thing i worried about....

i was worried about my class and level position as

first am i losing to my friends or classmate?
second , Even if i am good enough to get top5 of my class, what if my class was only the average type class so i am worried about my level position.
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This Friday, i finally got back my report book.
i got to admit i am both impressed and happy that i got that kind of good marks.

But i will keep it as secret for now....
As i can use my results to exchange for your results, so i can know each other mark!!!

Sport carnival 2007- floorball 1st.

That day was a tired and fun day(the first 2 hour as i am having the floorball final)

The semi final- 2-0
Final- 2-0

i finally won the gold medal!
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Joke time,: a good horse

there is one student who wrote a wrong word in a sentence and his teacher scolded him.
S= student, T= teacher

S: what do u want from me?!, even a good horse were also fall down before....

T: what u said is not wrong but when a human use a whip and whip that kind of horse, the horse will pay attention and will never make the same mistake again.

S: BUT sometime , that kind of horse will kick that man who whip it in the nose!!!

Stupid ming YOUTH part 3

7 years old stupid ming found out that his father has a big batch of white hair so he asked,
"why did u have white hair???"

"my son so playful and naughter so my hair got more and more of white hair."

Stupid ming thought for a short moments and spoke," i think grandpa's son is also so naughter and playful so he got lot of white hair!"

Stupid ming YOUTH part 2

I join the inter-house-floorball.
And the results is :
( note* the results on the left is my team score)
first match against red house
second match against blue house
last match against green house

5:0- we won. i score 2 goal while another good player score 3.
1:1-A draw.my team score the goal in the last 20 sec before the game end
3 or 2 ( i forgot):1-we won. won by luck, the other team was skillful.

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Time for joke.

Ming's father just teached ming the word 'sky'
He wanted to test if ming remeber so he asked some question.

F= father, M=ming


F: what is on top of your head?

M: hair

F: what is on top of your hair?

M: rooftop

F: what is on top of it?

M: tiles( thing use to make roof top)

His father got very angry and barked

"stupid!!! u better look clearly what other thing is on top of the tiles?"

M: still got.......got birds flying....

F: U......u...u........

stupid ming YOUTH

teacher: ming, C-A-t is what word?

Ming: i don't know.

teacher: what does your mum use to caught mouse?

Ming: mouse traps

teacher: no! no! , which animal love to drink milk?

ming: A baby

teacher: u are so stupid, what thing snatch your sister's face?

ming: my fingernail.

Teacher: Don't test my Patience! see the courtyard and tell me what aniaml did u see!

ming: small cat

*( note CAT is cat in english not small cat)

teacher: u.........u......u...

* this is taken from a book

My results

After 13 joke, i am writing a new post about myself.
My mid year exam is finally over a few days ago.
Now i know a few of my results.

Eng, 61, B4

Sci, 63, B4

Math, 75.8 , A1

Chinese, 78, A1

History, 81 , A1

Lit, 68.5/75 = 91/100, A1

Home e , cooking, unknown.

After reading all the 13 joke which included long and short joke / story, i wish to ask some feedback/ comments from all of you,
Do u like long ( 13 to 23 lines) , short ( 4 to 12 lines) or very long ( 23 and above lines) story/ joke better??? , u may tag it at the tag board. Thank you.

memory is too poor

one farmer walked home from a market one day.on the way he feel that there is something he forgot to do but whatever he think, he could not remember what is the thing he forgot.
He get more and more worried on the way home. He stopped five times on the road to open he diary to see what he had forgotten to do but he found out he had done everythiny.

Before long, he reach home. His daughter come out to welcome him. The daughter looked sad spoke," father, where have u left mum ??? she is not back home!"

this is taken from a book

write wrongly

son: the teacher said my compo write too far( write wrongly) from the tittle.

father: i thought the compo ( my father) was written by me a few days ago.

son: the bigger problem is it told me to write my father but u wrote my grandfather which is your father but not my!!!

taken form a book

dumb and dumbier

Two rich man were talking, name A and B

Suddenly, A said ," my driver is so dumb!"

B replied,"no way!, my driver is then the most dumb person!!!"

A barked," my driver is the most dumb!"

B snapped," i bet a 1000 dollar my is the most dumb!"

A roared," i accept the bet!!!"

B ," i will prove it!!!"

B," Ah beng come here!!!!"

Ah beng," yes , my master."

B," here is 10 dollar , go to the car showroom and buy me a (a car brand worth at least 60000 dollar)

Ah beng," yes sir right away sir!"

Then ah beng rush off.

A laughted and said," your driver is only dumb but my is most dumb, i will prove it!"

A roared," Ah seng come here!!!"

ah seng ," yes sir."

A ordered," ah seng rush back to my house to see if i am at home!!!"

ah seng replied," yes sir , right away sir!"

B said," ok, u won the 1000 dollar, i accept that i lose."

Then both of them laughted a lot.

Mean while, ah beng and ah seng met on the road while they were doing their mission.

Ah beng spoke,' u know my boss the most dumb, today sunday car showroom not open, he want me buy a car, so dumb!"

Ah seng said," that is nothing! my boss the most dumb, he tell me to go to his house to see if he at home, he got handphone don't know how to call back to see if he at home!!!"

Stupid Ming part 3

pls read " the boy who was kick out of school after two days" and " stupid ming part 2"

33 years pass....

stupid ming is now 55 years old
after so many years his talking illness is not 100% cure so he too have problem speaking...

One day, he went to a shopping mall to shop.
First he went to a cooking equipment stall. he wanted to buy a frying pan
and shouted," i want a pants( trousers) , i want a pants"

The shop assistant think fot a while and said ," u want a pan!"

"right!" snapped ming

the shop assistant took a shiny frying pan and let ming see.
ming buy it and walked out of the shop.

stupid ming and a pet dog at home. he decided to but a bun.
he walked into a bread shop and barked,"i want a butt, i want a butt!"

everyone inside was shocked and feeling ??????
the shop assistant think for 5 min before saying," i know, u want a bun!"

"right" snapped ming

the shop assistant took a big bun and let him see. ming buy it and walked away.
suddenly , ming think that he lack of clock.So he walked into a clock shop and barked," i want a cork , i want a cork!!!"

"what???"asked the person in charge.

" Cork!!!!"ming snapped

the person think for 10 min and hand ming a small colourful clock.
ming buy it and went home.

he was on his way home when a old lady stopped him and asked
," may i know the time now???"

Ming said," ok, pls hold my pants( pan) and butt( bun) while i take my cork(clock) out."

" lecher !!!@#$!%" shouted the old lady. she then slapped stupid ming two time and ran away.

" what did i do wrong???"ming asked

????????????????????

Stupid Ming Part 2

Pls read " the boy who was kick out of school after two days" post as this is the continued story.

About 15 years later....

Stupid ming was 23 years old.

One day, he found out he got a illness that make he unable to speak.

After 2 year of treatment, he was 50% heal. He could only speak like,"you...you..you".speaking the same word over and over again for at least 2 times.

One day, stupid ming was feeling boring. he walked out of the hospital.

He went to a flashlight to buy a flashlight.

But stupid ming know flashlight as torchlight.

He spoke to the boss(a women)," i want tor...tor...torc..torch"

But due to speaking problem, the lady heard "i want to touch"(he want to speak torch)

Immediately she slapped stupid ming.stupid ming ran out.

Soon he was hungry.he booked a table at a hotel.

Soon he reached that hotel.

He spoke to a waitress but she does not understand.

so stupid ming said ," i want to see your man....man...man"( he want to speak manager)

The lady thought that he was finding his boyfriend. She called him here.

The man spoke ," you want to see me?!?!"

Stupid ming said," i bo...boo..."( wanted to said booked)

but was heard as box, mean punch

The man said ," what u want to box!!!No respect for me"
he then give him a big punch, saying," here is yr punch!!"

Stupid ming was afraid and ran away.

He hungry as he did not eat breakfast and lunch.

He walked and walked and walked to greylang in mistake.

he saw a chicken rice stall.

he ordered a plate of chicken.

Beside the stall was a brothel.

Stupid ming waited and shouted," i want chicken! i want chicken!"

Last time, chicken mean" woman in brothel"

the boss of the brothel heard ming and bring out a woman.

Stupid ming was very hungry and shouted,' i want chicken i want chicken!!,more chicken!!"

Stupid ming kept on shouting until the whole of the woman was brought out of the brothel by the boss.

The boss got angry and took out the bill.

He went to ming, and spoke," do u know how much is it???"

stupid ming took out the menu from the table and spoke," it is 2.50 dollar."

the boss got so angry and shouted,"it cost 7777!"

" why so expensive???" asked ming

" u see there , there are 50 woman there@!#$%!"

"i did not ordered" said ming

" wasted my time U !@#$%!" barked the boss and beaten ming up.

" what wrong did i do???" asked ming